SMS in Hindi, Funny Hindi Jokes, Shayari in Hindi

Ek Faqeer tha…
Bheekh maangne ke liye masjid ke bahar baitha tha..
Sab namaazi Ankh bacha kar chale gaye
Aur use kuchh na mila.
Wo phir church gaya, Phir mandir
Or  Phir gurudware.
Lekin, usko kisi ne kuch na diya..
Aakhir mein wo Ek Beer bar ke bahar aa kar baith gaya..
Jo bhi sharabi bahar nikalte
woh uske katore me kuch daal dete..
Uska katora noto se bhar gaya…
Fakir bola.
“Waah re Prabhu”
Rehte kahan ho, Aur Address kahan ka Dete ho..!

Golu or Molu Bahut Achhe Dost Thhe Par Achanak 
Ek Hi Din Dono Mar Jate Hai Aur Ikathe Narak Mein 
Pahunchte Hai. 
Golu Ne Molu Ko Dekha Aur Hairan Hote Hue Pucha. 
Golu: ��Abe Tu Kaise Mara?�� 
Molu: ��Thand Se, Aur Tu?�� 
Golu: ��Mene Aatam Hatya Ki�� 
Molu: ��Kyu Be, Tu To Achha Bhala Tha Aur Khushi Se Jee Raha Thha?�� 
Golu: ��Yaar, Mujhe Laga Meri Biwi Ka Kisi Se Affair Hai, Ek Din Shaq Hone Pe Chaapa Maara Par Koi Nahi Tha, Sharm Ke Mare Maine Aatm-Hatya Kar Li�� 
Molu Ne Golu Ko Zor Se Thapad Mara Aur Bola. 
��HARAMKHOR Agar Fridge Khol Ke Dekha Hota, To Na Tu Sharm Se Marta Aur 
. 
Na Mein Thand Se

Hum chat par charhe patang urane ke bahane, 
Wo bhi chat par aayi kapde sukhane ke bahane, 

Uske mummy ne jo dekha ye haseen nazara, 
Jhadu le aayi wo bandar bhagane ke bahane.

SCHOOL LIFE:
Most Irritating Moments - Morning Alarm
Most Difficult Task - To find Socks
Most Dreadful Journey - Way to Class
Most Lovely Time - Meeting Friends
Most Tragic Moments - Surprise Test in 1st Period
Most Wonderful News - Teacher is ABSENT

Murgi aur Kauwe ki shaadi fix ho gyi.
Murga:- Aakhir mujhme kya kami thi, tumhari cast ka tha, us kauwa me aisa kya tha. 
Murgi:- Amma baba ki khwahish thi ki ladka airforce me hona chahiye.

Sunny Leone:- "Ragini MMS 2" me sabko dara ke rakh dungi.
Pappu:- Darr to aapki pehle ki movies me bhi lagta tha, 
            Kahin peeche se mummy papa na aa jayein.

Argument between British and India. 
British:- We spoiled your mother land for 200 years. 
India:- We are spoiling your mother tongue daily.

Ek Train me yatra karte hue do Girls baat kar rahin thi..
First Girl - Tujhe kaisa pati chahiye?
Second Girl - Mujhe ek CROREPATI pati chahiye.
First Girl - Agar CROREPATI nahin mila to.
Second Girl - To 50 lakh k 2 pati bhi chalenge.
First Girl - Agar 50 lakh wala bhi nahin mila to.
Second Girl - To 25 lakh ke 4 pati bhi chalenge.
In dono ki baat sunkar upar ki berth par baitha hua SANTA bola
"Jab ye 100 rupaye par aaye to mujhe utha dena."

KG girl & boy
Boy:- Can i kiss ur hand.
Girl :- why??
Are my lips poisonous...??
Boy :- Baap re mai to pogo dekhta hu,
ye to HBO dekh ke aai hai...
p :D :O :D...

Santa, Banta aur Pappu picnic pe gaye,
Pahuchne k baad yaad ayaki pepsi ghar bhul gye.
Decide hua ki Pappu ghar se pepsi layega.
Pappu ki ek shart thi ki 
jab tak main na aau koi samose nahi khaega.
2 din guzar gaye, pappu nahi aya.
4 din guzar gaye, nahi aya.
Santa Banta ne socha ab samosa kha lene chahye..
Jese hi santa -banta samose khane lage...
Ped k peeche se Pappu nikla aur bola:
Aise cheating karoge to main pepsi lene nahi jaunga!

Santa train me ek seat par akela leta tha.
Ek aadmi aaya aur bola:"bhai thoda side me ho jaiye mujhe bhi baithna hai.
Santa:"tujhe pata hai mai kaun hu..??
Aadmi darr k dusri jagah baith gaya phir ek pahalwan aaya aur bola:
"side me ho ja chotu mujhe baithna hai"
Santa:"abe oye tujhe pata hai mai kaun hu"
Pahalwan ne santa ki gardan pakad k utha liya aur bola:
"haanbol tu kaun hai..??.
Santa:"ji mai Bimaar hu".. 2 din se tezz bukhar hai.